Please Send All Complaints to the Office of President Snow
by Snarkleoff
Summary: The Hunger Games is a daunting task full of killer tributes. One however can't seem to take anything seriously. Lux. She has a childish and nonsensical attitude that actually hides a sharp and cunning mind which she hopes will help her through the games. She also has an alliance with Katniss Everdeen, a girl who can't seem to decide if she wants to kill her or protect her.
1. Chapter 1

**Please Send All Complaints to the Office of President Snow **

**Whoops my hand slipped. Damn you plot bunnies. **

**Double posting cause this is so short.**

* * *

Tributes. Players in a game of what should be named a sacrifice. This sacrificial gathering of what is the saddest part of the year is ironically noted as being called the Hunger Games.

These words have been ranted and repeated each year to the one known as Lux Galloway. Not that she ever really listened, or cared.

Her hatred of the capitol wasn't legendary or great. It wasn't more than any other average citizen with slight feelings of discontent. It isn't because she hasn't seen the same horrors of others who quietly whisper to each other of the tyranny of all capitol citizens, of how they treat the death of every district citizen as some kind of joking spectacle that is something to be laughed at.

It's not that she likes it. She just doesn't care enough, isn't determined enough to want to join in on the whispers to help others thrown to the ground and practically spit on. It isn't because she is afraid. She has enough bravery to fight against things she gives the personal effort or care to try to stop.

At least if she wasn't brave her reasons wouldn't be so... almost horrifying to hear.

But the capitol has never singled out or wronged her in any personal way. Her parents died quietly of a sickness that went around District three when she was nine. The capitol didn't cause this. The capitol didn't send her and her two year old sister to one of the only orphanages in the district. Two of the worst events in her life were not the capitol's fault. So she never had any true reason to feel anger or rage against the capitol citizens.

Until one day, she did.

"And the tribute for the girls: Lux Galloway!"


	2. Chapter 2

** Please Send All Complaints to the Office of President Snow ch2**

**Like I said double post**

* * *

To hear your name be called in front of a classroom full of onlooking teenagers is scary. To hear your name be called in front of hundreds of your fellow district citizens to be chosen as what is basically, the sacrificial lamb; that's chilled to the bone, almost pee your pants, shake in fear, absolutely terrifying. That's, I want to leave, you must have the wrong name. That's, please god no.

That's what just happened to Lux Galloway.

After her name was called she made her way to the stage under the solemn eyes of all her fellow district citizens. Quietly going towards the mic, she quickly goes across the stage and schools her expression into a grin. The sudden change of expression is jarring, especially in the circumstances Lux finds herself in. Everyone who is and will ever watch these games in the future will always wonder why she has such a jovial expression. Even the capitol citizens will find it odd as to why it's so wide, or how it looks as if she's in on a joke no one will ever know.

The escort for District Three looks at the grin in confusion for a moment, but decides that it is probably the most positive reaction to ever happen on reaping day. So she quickly widens her own smile and looks back at all the citizens, grabbing the name for the male tribute on the way to the mic, and then loudly announces, "And for the boys: Ramsey Hayes!"

Cue smattering of applause and young teenager shakily making his way to the stage.

After a few more minutes of the escort squawking and fluffing herself up, she finally yelled out the proverbial catchphrase of the Hunger Games. "Happy Hunger Games and may the odds be ever in your favor!"

Silent huffs and unseen rolls of eyes, and then Lux and Ramsey are being carted away into a room to await their goodbyes.

* * *

Sitting quietly with a grin still fixed upon her face, Lux waits patiently, while the peacekeeper stationed next to the door stares out into the room as if he really was a statue.

A little girl runs into the small room with tears in her eyes. She has the same naturally tanned, bronzed skin as Lux, and the same long inky black hair. The only major difference being the colors of their eyes, as the older girl has a crisp and clear green, while the younger has a deep dark brown.

The girl runs straight to Lux, almost barreling her over with the force she exudes when she jumps to hug her around the middle. "Lux!"

The older girl grins down at her as if nothing is wrong and says, "Hey Shorty! What's up?"

The little girl, who is actually Lux's eleven year old sister named Wren leans her head back, still keeping her arms around her sister's middle, and with a scratchy voice says, "Your name."

Lux raises a brow and looks at her still amused, "What about it?"

"It was called! You're one of the tributes!"

"Yeah I know, I was there."

Wren continues, ignoring her older sister's callous words, "They're going to take you away! Please don't go! You'll die if you go!"

Lux tilts her head thoughtfully and Wren tightens her hold around her waist as if she could keep her there just by holding on to her.

Finally Lux lightly pushes her sister away, causing the smaller girl to whimper in fright that she is already leaving, and kneels down so she's at eye level.

She grabs Wren and pulls her towards her chest and her little sister starts to sob into her nicest dress.

"Please don't die Lux, please!"

The green eyed girl, breathes in deeply and then finally says, "I'll do my best."

Wren nods, not seeming entirely happy with the answer. Then she jabs her hand into her pocket and starts to fumble around looking for something while Lux watches on silently.

When she finally finds what she's looking for she triumphantly yanks it out of her pocket and holds it up to her older sister proudly. The object she took out of her pocket is an old, obviously well-loved coin.

She hold it up to Lux and asks with tears in her voice, "Can you take this?"

She shakily places the coin in the middle of Lux's outstretched hand. After examining the old coin; that at one time seemed to have pictures and words on it, but at this point are way too worn out to recognize, Lux finally looks up with a raised brow.

"I found and gave this to you."

Wren looks up with a wet face and quivering lips, heartbroken eyes looking at her sister as if she'll vanish. "Please, will you take it for me?"

Lux makes a fist around the coin and then fully stands from her crouching position. She finally looks at her sister with a grin, flicking the coin into the air and the deftly catching it. "Alright you've twisted my arm. I'll take the coin."

Wren nods and then hugs her around the middle again. After a few moments though the peacekeeper grabs her and starts to usher her out the door. "Times up, let's go."

Wren is escorted out with loud sobs.

Lux purses her lips, but then starts to grin again.

Taking the coin she starts to roll it across her knuckles with ease. From her pointer finger, to her pinky, under her palm and then from finger to finger again. She does it until the peacekeepers leads her to the train.

She didn't expect any other visitors, so she wasn't disappointed that her sister was the only one.

* * *

On the train she officially meets her mentor, escort, and district mate.

Beetee a dark-skinned man with glasses is her mentor. Lux examines him thoughtfully and then finally says, "Your goatee is fantastic."

That's all she says until he and her bright red (which she thinks looks like blood) escort finishes their introductions.

The escort, whose name is Jekie, finally asks, "So, any questions?"

And Lux answers with, "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

Jekie glares, huffs and leaves the room. Ramsey snickers and Beetee looks at her nervously.

Lux tries to over-exaggeratedly pout, but a grin keeps fighting to come over her face. "Now we'll always be left wondering."

Beetee goes over to the table full of food and starts to quietly eat. Ramsey glances at him and then turns to Lux with a slightly timid expression and some jittering.

Finally he puts his hand out and says, "I-I'm Ramsey. I guess were district partners."

She stares at him for a second. He has brown hair and is almost half a foot shorter than her own 5'6. Then she stares at his hand and ignores it, instead saying, "I think I'll eat your entrails first."

Lux starts to grin at him and he snatches his hand back towards himself, looking at her fearfully. "W-Wh-What?"

The taller girl doesn't respond, instead she grins at him and then leans closer, sniffing at him exaggeratedly as if she wanted to make sure the meat is still good.

He jumps up and away from her, and then scurries to his room without glancing back, Lux's loud laughter following him.

She goes to the table were Beetee is now staring at her with a fork halfway to his mouth.

"I really know how to clear out a room." She continues to giggle and then starts to load up more food onto her plate. "More food for me."

Beetee stares at her for a few moments and then asks, "Is this going to be your angle, crazy?"

Lux looks up and then starts to twist her fork around her fingers. "Well I actually am a crazy person, but I can definitely amp it up for a crowd."

Beetee nods thoughtfully, and examines her in silence. "And no one would expect under all that is actually a sharp mind."

Lux bobs her head up and down while still shoveling food into her mouth. Her other hand now occupied by her coin as she rolls it across her knuckles, not even seeming to notice she was doing it.

Beetee observes her for a few moments, and then stares at her hand with the coin. "You have a problem sitting still." He says it as a statement, already knowing the answer, but Lux nods anyway.

The mentor for a few minutes looks to be trying to solve a hard problem, and then finally he says, "I can work with this."

Lux continues to eat, the only thing showing she was even listening being when she gives him a thumbs up.

* * *

Awhile later after a shaky looking Ramsey and a still peeved Jekie came out of their rooms and they all crowd around the television to watch the reapings.

The first was of course the district one candidates. Self-satisfied looking boy, and a hot blonde, that somehow manages to look like a hooker. When they were both up on stage Lux tilts her head slightly and then says, "She's maybe an 8.5, 9 on a good day. He's a 6, and that's being generous."

All of the other occupants of the room look at her in confusion, thinking that it's odd that she's guessing other tributes scores already and that there such unusual numbers.

District two comes on and she narrows her eyes in thought. A large buff blonde boy and an average sized, sharp eyed brunette. "She's an 8. He's also an 8, maybe a 9 if he stops scowling so much."

When her own district comes on Lux makes noises as if she can't decide and then finally says, "I'd be too bias to rate myself, but you're, about a 4."

Ramsey whips around, momentarily forgetting his earlier fear and glares at her angrily, as to what he believes is her calling him weak.

Jekie finally speaks up and huffs out an irritated breath. "Lux honestly. You must stop it!"

Lux of course ignores her and continues giving out scores that don't make sense to anyone but herself.

When it gets to district elven she watches silently as a little girl comes onto the screen. She's even smaller and darker than her own sister, but she still frowns at the thought that, that could have been Wren if she was a year older. The boy is huge in comparison, so the effect of them standing next to each other just makes both of their sizes more jarring.

"He's a 6.5, maybe a 7. I wouldn't feel right rating her on the hotness scale, she's way too adorable and young, but definitely a 10 on the adorable scale."

They all turn to her with various degrees of incredulity. Finally Ramsey speaks up, "Did you say hotness scale?"

Lux grins at him with twinkling eyes and answers, "Yeah, I was rating them on who was the best looking." Her expression then changes to faux confusion, "Is this not a beauty pageant?"

She glances at the screen out of the corner of her eye at the yell of, "Primrose Everdeen!"

The other three are still staring at her, but finally turn at the sound of, "I volunteer!"

Four pairs of eyes now stare at the screen when a tall brunette with her hair in a braid, starts to make her way to the stage.

Lux watches as the girl who was most likely about the same age as she is, walks. She notices her determined steps, the confident way she almost glides.

When the girl finally makes her way to the stage, her face is set in a firm, resolute expression, as if she would take on the world if only someone would give her a good reason.

The escort on the screen asks her what her name is and she answers with, "Katniss Everdeen."

"I bet my buttons that was your sister. Don't want her to steal all the glory, do we? Come on, everybody! Let's give a big round of applause to our newest tribute!"

The crowd sits silently for a moment and then they all lift their hands and touch the three middle fingers of their left hands to their lips and hold it out to the newest district twelve female tribute.

Lux swallows and then says, "She's a 10. Definitely a 10." Not entirely sure if she's still just talking about the girls attractiveness or if she means something else.

No one acknowledges her statement anyways, as their all too busy watching the girl, Katniss Everdeen.

* * *

**AN: Thank you to everyone who read. And sorry for such a short first chapter, it saw mostly a style choice.  
**

**This is probably going to be OC/Katniss. Partly because you don't see enough Katniss femslash. (Except Joniss of course. Which is life.) Also because when I told my friend the OC's personality, she said the interactions between them would be hilarious. ****I agree, but we'll see.**

**To all those who have read my other stories. Hey.**

**To those new here. Also hey.**

**Sorry about my twilight story. I'm getting it done I swear. I just really haven't been in a twilight mood lately. Sorry.**

**I am however in a Hunger Games mood. So yay! **

**Anyways tell me what you think.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Please Send All Complaints to the Office of President Snow**

******AN:T**hank you to all that have read, favorited, and followed. Cookies for you. A special thanks to ******the four reviewers, ** ** GunRecon 11, Guest, Bam, and ****Vixey-Fox More cookies for you.**

* * *

Pushing, pulling, and shoving. It sounds like a fight between children. Unfortunately it's actually what tributes have to deal with when they first meet their stylist.

Lux's stylist is a tall, emaciated woman, who looks as if a strong gust of wind would cause her to fly away. She's dressed as ostentatiously as every other capitol citizen, and is easily forgettable in a crowd of her fellow natives. Her personality is something that Lux finds abhorrent and she makes it a point not to remember her name.

Her idea for the tribute parade is not doing anything to endear her to Lux either.

"Silver! I love the color of silver. And what does silver make people think of?" The stylist is looking at Lux in excitement and the question is unfortunately not rhetorical.

Lux smiles and answers with a saccharine sweet voice, "The color of the knife I'm going to use to stab you in the face."

The stylist doesn't even bat an eye at her answer. "Close, but no. Electronics."

The stylist primps her some more and then comes back later with as an awful as outfit as Lux expected.

"Oh just think of all the sponsors you're going to get. You're going to look beautiful."

"Pity sponsors."

"Oh I can see it now. You'll be the best looking tribute out there."

"I doubt it."

And Lux was right. After getting shoved into the awful costume agreed upon by the stylists of District Three, they walk out to the carriages where most of the other tributes are already waiting, talking to their own teams.

Ramsey looks just as miserable as she is and it's nice to know someone agrees upon the injustice of these outfits.

They are at least not the only ones who are in ridiculous attire, as almost everyone has some kind of outlandish accessories on their outfits. Most, like her, have some stupid looking headdress and eye-catching color.

Though there are some exceptions, District Two's tributes actually look good in their gladiator armor, and Twelve seems pretty tame in comparison to the rest of the districts, with their matching black suits.

The District Twelve girl, the volunteer, feels Lux's stare and catches her eye. Lux can't quite remember her name, just that it had something to do with cats, or something. So Lux decides that she'll just call the girl Kitty.

Kitty keeps staring, seeming to try to intimidate, and at this point they've both stopped listening to whatever last minute advice their teams are trying to give them. The volunteer keeps glowering and finally Lux grins and gives her a thumbs up.

The girl stops staring and immediately blinks looking confused. Lux almost laughs at the look on her face, but instead she just starts to make weird faces, trying to see if Kitty can actually have an expression that isn't sour.

Kitty, gives her an annoyed look and Lux can't help but start to laugh, causing the District Twelve tribute to glare at her angrily. Lux starts to make another face, but her view of the girl is then blocked by her stylist.

"Lux, are you even listening to me?!"

"No."

She huffs and starts to walk away. "Fine, figure it out yourself then!"

Lux puts her thumbs up and grins. "Antagonize everyone, got it."

She climbs up onto the chariots without another word and immediately starts to look around. Lux looks back to the District Twelve chariot to see that the volunteer still looks annoyed and is getting helped onto her own ride.

When she faces in Lux's direction again, Lux starts to wiggle her eyebrows and stick her tongue out. Kitty glares at her again, and look as if she wants to jump down from where she is, storm over, and punch the District Three tribute in the face.

She of course seethes in silence from where she is, while her district partner from twelve looks at her in worry. Lux turns back around, the last thing she sees being the District Twelve stylist putting something on their costumes.

It only took a few more minutes before the first chariot started to move. District One's tributes slowly rolled out and the both put on their most winning smiles, acting as if they love the weird pink fluff that their wearing. Second District starts to slowly follow, and they go for a charming, strong factor.

Finally the District Three chariot follows, Ramsey nervously stays still, afraid if he moved he would throw up, or fall; really anything to embarrass himself.

Lux leans on the walls of the chariot and yawns looking bored. She only makes it about halfway before she throws her headdress at someone in the crowd. Then she blows a raspberry and tries not to fall asleep.

The crowd around her looks stunned at that display for a moment, but then they break out in louder cheers, obviously thinking it was some kind of memento for a lucky capitol citizen. She will never understand the capitol's mindset.

The cheers then go wild and Lux finally looks up at the screens, to see all of them change to the face of the District Twelve tributes.

They're surrounded by fire, Kitty and the boy are both holding hands above they're head, and they're throwing kisses to the crowd with smiles. Though Kitty looks much more awkward and stilted while doing it then the blonde boy.

Lux looks at the displays and has to admit that she's impressed. Every screen has District Twelve plastered across it, and every citizen is clamoring to get a look at the tributes.

They finally all make it to the same place and stop, standing silently for the anthem to play and then they're off again, rolling out of sight.

Lux hops down as soon as the chariot stops and starts to pull at the costume annoyingly.

She looks at Ramsey as he comes to stand beside her. "This stupid chainmail chafes so much! And why is it so heavy?!"

Ramsey isn't paying attention, and is instead giving the District Twelve tributes a dirty look, something that almost every other tribute is also doing. In fact, the only ones not doing it seem to be Lux herself, and the cute little girl from Eleven.

Kitty also looks around and seems to see the same looks, but instead of looking uneasy, she just swallows and lifts her chin, obviously trying to hide any of her nervousness. Lux smiles at the action, actually finding it oddly endearing.

The volunteer turns in her direction and looks surprised at the non-combative expression that Lux is sporting, but that quickly melts to aggravation. Before anything else can be done however, they're both shooed away to elevators for their floors.

Lux, Ramsey and the rest of their team, make it to floor three, and her and Ramsey immediately look around in awe.

"This is even better than the train," Ramsey whispers reverently.

Jekie gets a wide grin on her face and says, "Only the best for our tributes. You're all stars now."

Lux leans on a wall and examines the place, not even looking at Jekie when she says, "So fattening us up like lambs for a slaughter."

"Lux!"

The tribute grins and finally turns to her escort. "My bad, did you have some other farm animals in mind?"

Beetee interrupts before an argument starts. "That was some quick thinking throwing your headdress like that Lux, nice job."

Lux turns to him in surprise and gets a faux innocent expression on her face. "I was hoping to hit someone. Make this the games they could never forget because they got a concussion."

Jekie whips towards her in anger. "That is enough Lux, this insufferable attitude you're sporting needs to stop if you want to have hope of getting any sponsors!"

Lux looks at her with her lips twitching trying to fight the smile that wants to grow on her face. "Maybe I don't want any sponsors."

Jekie throws her arms up frustrated beyond belief, at what she sees as a childish tribute, saying things that might as well have been sacrilege. "Fine if you want to die in the games, then that is your choice. Come along Ramsey, let's talk strategy."

The boy walks quickly towards the red covered woman, almost as if a fire is on his tail. They both disappear down a hallway and then Beetee turns towards Lux.

Lux grins at the man and says, "Well I have them sold on my wondrous personality."

Beetee just sighs and asks, "Do you remember the strategy we worked out in the train."

"Personality, brains, agility."

"And no weapon skills"

"Not unless you want me to hurt myself."

Beetee looks thoughtful for a moment and then says, "Tomorrow in training, why don't you try and focus on one of the easier weapons."

"Nope, I'm better with my hands." Lux wiggles her fingers for emphasis. "I can juggle, you know."

Beetee sighs, something he knows he's going to be doing a lot with this girl around, and says, "That's not going to help you survive."

Lux tilts her head back and forth, considering. "It might."

"It won't. Lux, I am a victor and have been a mentor for years. You need to listen to me, I know what I'm talking about."

She puts her hands up, trying to placate him. "I don't doubt that your wise and know your stuff, but I am horrible with plans. And they never really stick well in the heat of the moment. I'm more of a play it by ear kinda girl."

Beetee sighs, again, and says, "Fine, do as you wish, but please try and learn something tomorrow at training."

Lux salutes him and walks away without another word.

She goes to explore and sees her room. She only examines it for a moment before walking right back out, almost walking into a girl dressed in red. The girl gasps involuntarily and in that quick moment, Lux sees that she has no tongue.

The girl immediately starts to scuttle away, seeming frightened and Lux watches her go with furrowed brows, having no idea what or who that was.

Later at dinner, which was an awkward and quiet affair, the same girl silently serves them all dinner, and Lux can't help but to stare at her in confusion.

"Lux!"

The tribute quickly turns to her escort at the calling of her name. Jekie is looking at her in annoyance and says, "Stop staring and let them do their jobs."

"But what-"

"No talking, no staring. Eat, now."

"What? But-"

"Eat."

Lux glares at her, but then starts eat, as loudly as possible, causing Jekie to again start glaring at her.

Throughout the rest of dinner, whenever Jekie is turned in another direction, Lux makes it her mission to throw food in her hair. It's so big that she doesn't even notice, until later as she stands and a pea rolls out, and by then Lux had already left

As soon as she leaves the dinner table, Lux makes her way around, trying to find something to cure her boredom. Finally she finds her way to elevator and examines the floors looking for something that looks interesting. Finally she finds one at the top that says R, and she figures it must mean roof, so she presses it out of curiosity.

She waits for the doors to close and stands in silence, only hearing the quiet, whoosh, as the elevator goes past another floor.

When it finally reaches the roof, it opens to the surprised faces of the district twelve tributes. They've both changed into more comfortable clothes and the girl has her hair in a braid, something that seems to be her signature hairstyle. The boy is blonde and buff, and is actually slightly shorter than his fellow tribute.

The boy looks startled, but the girl's expression quickly changes to irritation. All three of them stand there in silence staring at each other. Then Lux breaks it when she suddenly smiles at the girl, seeming amused. The volunteer scowls in response.

Lux steps forward, into the annoyed girl's personal space, having to look up to see the other girl's expression. Kitty immediately starting to look uncomfortable at her sudden closeness.

The black haired tribute tilts her head up and whispers into the taller girl's ear, "You're blocking the exit."

The braided girl twitches at having someone so close and tries to ignore the fact that this is the most intimate personal contact she's had since she saw her sister.

They all stand in silence, no one moving or making any noise, finally Kitty's expression changes to vexation and she makes a sound in the back of her throat and moves to the side.

Lux steps away from the doors, and then the other two tributes step into the elevator. The blonde boy looking between them bewilderedly and the girl looking extremely aggravated.

As the elevator finally start to close, Lux smirks and gives the taller girl a wink and says, "Thanks Kitty-cat."

The doors close on the furious face of the female twelve tribute.

Lux laughs to herself and walks away to the edge of the building, looking down at the capitol's skyline.

At least she'll die in the games with a memory of a fantastic view and of how cute Kitty looks when she's livid.

* * *

**AN: Sorry this took so long. **

**Yes to Vixey-Fox, I will be continuing this, thanks for checking out all my stories by the way.**

**This story is going to have a main character who will make a joke out of almost everything, the other characters will of course not like it, or find it acceptable in most situations. She will have her moments of seriousness of course, and a lot of it really is for the crowd, but how much of is it actually an act is something I hope to touch upon, including how much of what Katniss does in the arena is an act or really what she wants to do in that situation. So if your not a big fan of Lux's personality, well, most of the other people won't be either.**

**I know not really many people have taken a look at this, but for the few who did and have actually wanted to read more of this, I apologize.**

**Anyway updates for this are going to be pretty sporadic, so yeah.**

**Thanks for reading, why don't you tell me what you think.**


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